The Loose Connections Recommender #10

On Holding On To Things, Letting Go & Stuff

I’ve long oscillated between internal tensions of releasing and holding on to stuff. Often the struggle is because of the knowledge that if I let go of something, its akin to letting go of the person it came from or it reminds me of, that if I don’t keep it, no one will know what it means, what it’s seen or meant, what it represents. I’m desperate to be a minimalist, but I still have silly sentimental items from my childhood, archival papers, trinkets and souvenirs and other odd unnecessary stuff. I love old things like beautiful old plates or dresses that seem to tremble with a history that resonates long beyond my own, that carry secrets and stories I’ll never know. It’s a balancing act that I’m constantly in a state of weighing up. I have come to terms with the fact that I can’t save every old, beautiful thing I own or find, and that I can let go of things I love that I no longer need and let them float away to find a new life. The more I do it, the easier it gets. Although I still have a lot of useless but meaningful stuff in my home, I love letting go of things now, it’s a beautiful release.

I worked a while packing and unpacking boxes for people that were moving house. I learned a lot and I’m still trying to make sense of the insights I gained into our collective desire to keep and gather and the things we hold close and attribute meaning to. Stuff maketh the (hu)man. I think I might have a book brewing in me about our relationship to stuff. But I digress… today’s Loose Connections Recommender #10 is about letting go and here are my recommendations;

1. All There Is with Anderson Cooper is “a series of emotional and moving conversations about the people we lose, the things they leave behind, and how to live on, with loss and with love”. This episode with Laurie Anderson talking about processing the loss of her partner Lou Reed (and her beloved dog Lolabelle) and the ongoing, evolving relationship with what’s left behind is so wise and fascinating and surprising and warm and funny - I can’t recommend it enough.

   “I think people turn into other things. They turn into music sometimes, a hobby…they turn into ideas. Sometimes their idea is the name of a whole philosophy. They turn into love …that love is inside you, thats it, that’s the monument of that person” Laurie Anderson

2. ‘Love is all there is, it makes the world go round…’ I recommend listening to this perfect song and reflecting on what matters often.

3. Find one thing in your home that you have kept for purely sentimental reasons but it doesn’t really make your heart sing and send it out into the world for someone else to enjoy. Marie Kondo that thing! Make space for the new, or just make space.

Burn after reading,

Lo x